Christmas Pet Peeves

I am not a shopaholic. I don't find much positive stimulation in buying new clothes, etc. A shopping mall is the last place you'd find me on my day off. But of all the days in the (Gregorian) calendar, December 25 a.k.a. Christmas Day is the one holiday I wouldn't mind pretending to be a shopaholic. It is the one day ever when I wish all malls were open.

Why? Because I dread Christmas family functions. You see, December 25 is an official holiday, hence malls and restaurants are closed. Which means I have no excuse not to go to my mother's annual "family" parties. "I'd rather stay home" is not an acceptable excuse. My mom won't let me get away with that. Damn.

Let me digress a bit here to explain what type of "family function/party" I'm talking about. The Christmas parties that my mother looks forward to, year after year after year, are not the kinds you see on TV ads or Hallmark greeting cards. They're not really gatherings of blood relatives. Remember, my mother and I are both immigrants. We have no other relative here. So her Christmas family is actually her network of Philippine-born friends here in Vancouver. And that's where the fun begins.

Geez, how do I explain my dread without sounding like an elitist bitch? I can't.

Let me enumerate the main reasons I dread my mother's parties:

1. * I don't like my mother's friends. (details)
   
2. * I'm ashamed of my mother's gifts. (details)